AEW Dark Results 9/7/21
The NOW Arena
Hoffman Estates, Illinois

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Commentary Team (Excalibur & TAZ)

Ring Announcer: Justin Roberts 

Transcription by Josh Lopez 

First Match: (36-7) Lance Archer vs. (0-4) Jason Hotch 

Hotch starts things off with The Suicide Dive. Archer catches Hotch in mid-air. Archer Chokeslams Hotch on the ring apron. Archer poses for the crowd. Hotch unloads three knife edge chops. Archer rocks Hotch with a forearm smash. Archer hits The Blackhole Slam. Archer with The Release German Suplex. Archer with three running elbow smashes. Archer puts Hotch on the top turnbuckle. Archer with a straight right hand. Archer connects with The Blackout to pickup the victory.

Winner: (37-7) Lance Archer via Pinfall 

Second Match: (20-11) The Bunny w/Penelope Ford vs. (0-3) Laynie Luck 

Luck gets distracted by Ford. Bunny attacks Luck from behind. Bunny repeatedly stomps on Luck’s chest. Ford attacks Luck behind the referee’s back. Bunny delivers The Sliding D. Bunny talks smack to Luck. Bunny unloads two knife edge chops. Bunny whips Luck across the ring. Luck with a flurry of rollups. Luck with forearm shivers. Bunny clotheslines Luck. Bunny rams Luck’s face against the canvas. Bunny kicks Luck in the gut. Bunny rakes the back of Luck. Bunny with a running knee lift. Bunny skips around the ring. Bunny connects with Down The Rabbit Hole to pickup the victory.

Winner: (21-11) The Bunny via Pinfall 

Third Match: (42-16) Evil Uno w/Stu Grayson & Colt Cabana vs. (18-30) Alan Angels w/John Silver & Preston Vance 

Uno tells Angels to shake his hand. Uno rolls Angels over for a two count. Angels dropkicks Uno. Angels with forearm shivers. Angels whips Uno across the ring. Uno holds onto the ropes and regroups on the outside. Collar and Elbow Tie Up. Uno backs Angels into the turnbuckles. Uno with a knife edge chop. Uno sends Angels to the corner. Angels dives over Uno. Angels applies a side headlock. Uno whips Angels across the ring. Angels runs into Uno. Uno drops Angels with a shoulder tackle. Angels drops down on the canvas. Angels with a leg lariat. Uno launches Angels over the top rope. Angels with an Apron Enzuigiri. Angels with The Flying Crossbody Block for a two count. Angels transitions into a corner mount. Uno dumps Angels face first on the top turnbuckle pad. Uno delivers The Big Boot. Uno rolls Angels back into the ring. We have an awkward standoff on the outside.

Uno with a blistering chop. Uno whips Angels across the ring. Angels with the sunset flip for a two count. Uno peppers Angels with forearms. Angels wants more punishment. Uno answers with three knife edge chops. That leads us to a quick shoving contest. Angels with a double leg takedown. Angels transitions into a ground and pound attack. Angels with two clotheslines. Angels slides under a clothesline from Uno. Angels with a Step Up Enzuigiri. Uno deck Angels with a back elbow smash. Angels drops Uno with The DDT for a two count. Uno fights out of the fireman’s carry position. Uno kicks Angels in the gut. Angels with The Counter Flatliner. Angels applies The Koji Clutch. Uno puts his foot on the bottom rope which forces the break. Angels lands The Orihara MoonSault. Angels rolls Uno back into the ring. Uno with a Running Boot. Uno throws Angels into the steel ring steps. Uno tosses Angels back inside the ring. Uno connects with The PumpHandle Flatliner to pickup the victory.

Winner: (43-16) Evil Uno via Pinfall 

Fourth Match: (25-7) The Acclaimed vs. (2-38) Shawn Dean & (0-6) Robert Anthony 

The Acclaimed attacks Dean and Anthony before the bell rings. Bowens unloads two knife edge chops. Anthony reverses out of the irish whip from Bowens. Bowens dives over Anthony. Bowens ducks a clothesline from Anthony. Bowens with a chop/jab combination. Bowens SuperKicks Anthony. Bowens drops Dean with The Reverse TKO. Bowens tags in Caster. The Acclaimed connects with The Mic Drop to pickup the victory.

Winner: (26-7) The Acclaimed via Pinfall 

Fifth Match: (30-28) Joey Janela w/Kayla Rossi vs. (0-1) Lee Moriarty 

Collar and Elbow Tie Up. Moriarty backs Janela into the turnbuckles. The referee calls for a clean break. Janela kicks Moriarty in the gut. Janela with a forearm smash. Janela poses for the crowd. Janela sends Moriarty to the corner. Moriarty with a Flying Arm-Drag. Moriarty sweeps out the legs of Janela. Janela avoids The Running Shoulder Kick. Janela scores the ankle pick. Moriarty with a Leaping Crossbody Block for a one count. Janela decks Moriarty with a back elbow smash. Janela scores a right jab. Moriarty applies a hammerlock. Moriarty drives Janela shoulder first into the ring apron. Moriarty lands The Suicide Dive. Janela fires back with a forearm smash. Janela rolls Moriarty back into the ring. Janela hooks the outside leg for a one count.

Janela unloads Two Mid-Kicks. Moriarty reverses out of the irish whip from Janela. Janela launches Moriarty over the top rope. Moriarty slams the left shoulder of Janela on the top rope. Janela punches Moriarty. Janela applies the cravate against the top strand. Rossi pulls Moriarty off the apron. Rossi sends Moriarty back first into the steel barricade. Rossi rolls Moriarty back into the ring. Janela hooks the outside leg for a two count. Janela applies a bodyscissors hold. Moriarty with three sharp elbow strikes. Janela with a blistering chop. Janela whips Moriarty into the turnbuckles. Moriarty sends Janela face first into the middle turnbuckle pad. Moriarty drops Janela with The Swinging Arm-Ringer. Moriarty decks Janela with a back elbow smash. Moriarty dives over Janela. Moriarty with a Step Up Enzuigiri. Moriarty with The Slide Through Double Foot Stomp for a two count.

Janela has Moriarty perched on the top turnbuckle. Janela with a forearm smash. Janela delivers The SuperPlex. Janela lands The Suicide Dive. Janela rolls Moriarty back into the ring. Moriarty with a Suicide Dive of his own. Janela and Moriarty are trading back and forth shots. Forearm Exchange. Janela SuperKicks Moriarty. Moriarty with a Step Up Enzuigiri. Moriarty goes for The Hammerlock Lariat, but Janela counters with The Release German Suplex. Moriarty reverses out of the irish whip from Janela. Moriarty with a running uppercut. Moriarty kicks the left elbow of Janela. Janela with an Inside Out Lariat. Janela hits The Spike PileDriver for a two count. Moriarty fights out of the fireman’s carry position. Moriarty with The Top Wrist Lock Takedown. Moriarty connects with The Hammerlock Lariat for a two count. Moriarty applies The CrossFace. Rossi puts Janela’s foot on the bottom rope which forces the break. Moriarty gets distracted by Rossi. Janela rolls Moriarty over for a two count. Janela plants Moriarty with The Death Valley Driver to pickup the victory. After the match, Sonny Kiss attacks Janela. Rossi pulls Janela out of the ring.

Winner: (31-28) Joey Janela via Pinfall 

Sixth Match: (0-0) The Dark Order (Colt Cabana & Stu Grayson) w/Evil Uno vs. (0-4) Rickey Shane Page & (0-5) Travis Titan 

Stu Grayson and RSP will start things off. Page attacks Grayson from behind. Page knocks Cabana off the ring apron. Page with a forearm smash. Page sends Grayson to the corner. Grayson with a running clothesline. The referee is trying to get Cabana out of the ring. Page and Titan gangs up on Grayson. Page tags in Titan. Titan delivers a gut punch. Titan attacks the midsection of Grayson. Titan repeatedly stomps on Grayson’s chest. Titan is choking Grayson with his boot. Titan tags in Page. Page kicks Grayson in the gut. Page with forearm shivers. Page tags in Titan. Page and Titan continues to stomp on Grayson’s chest.

Grayson matrix under the double clothesline. Grayson with The Double Pele Kick. Grayson tags in Cabana. Cabana ducks a clothesline from Page. Cabana with two double hand chops. Cabana unloads a flurry of right jabs. Cabana delivers The Bionic Elbow. Page whips Cabana across the ring. Cabana drops Page with The Quebrada. Cabana with The Flying Asshole. Grayson tags himself in. SpringBoard Elbow Drop/Side Walk Slam Combination. Grayson tags in Cabana. Grayson nails Page with The Pump Knee Strike. Grayson connects with The Night Fall. Cabana plants Titan with The Chicago Skyline to pickup the victory.

Winner: (1-0) The Dark Order via Pinfall 

Seventh Match: (31-13) Big Swole vs. (27-15) Diamante In A Three Strikes Match 

Diamante dodges The Pump Kick. Swole ducks a clothesline from Diamante. Swole sends Diamante into the ropes. Swole with The Pump Kick. Swole kicks Diamante in the face. Swole with a knife edge chop. Swole whips Diamante across the ring. Diamante ducks a clothesline from Swole. Diamante blocks The Hip Toss. Diamante rolls Swole over for a two count. Swole with forearm shivers. Swole drops Diamante with The Flatliner for a one count. Swole repeatedly stomps on Diamante’s back. Swole kicks the left hamstring of Diamante. Swole with a blistering chop. Diamante reverses out of the irish whip from Swole. Swole dives over Diamante. Swole ducks a clothesline from Diamante. Diamante delivers The Kitchen Sink. Diamante mocks Swole.

Diamante with forearm shivers. Diamante with a knife edge chip. Short-Arm Reversal by Swole. Swole nails Diamante with two cross chops. Diamante avoids The Roundhouse Kick. Swole HeadButts Diamante. Swole whips Diamante across the ring. Swole hits The Blue Thunder Bomb. The referee checks on Diamante. Swole is putting the boots to Diamante. Swole with The Kamigoye for a two count. Swole goes for The Dirty Dancing, but Diamante rolls her over with a handful of tights to score the first strike of this match. Diamante with a Running Knee Strike. Diamante transitions into a ground and pound attack. Swole with a double leg takedown. Diamante denies The Texas Cloverleaf. Diamante scores the elbow knockdown. Diamante with a Corner Dropkick for a two count. Diamante applies the cravate. Diamante transitions into a grounding cobra twist. Swole puts her foot on the bottom rope which forces the break.

Diamante drives her elbow into Swole’s chest. Diamante applies a rear chin lock. Diamante hammers down on Swole’s chest. Diamante applies a half straight jacket hold. Swole with a drop toe hold. Swole makes Diamante tap out to The Heel Hook. We’re all tied up at 1-1. Diamante regroups on the outside. Diamante grabs a kendo stick. Swole with a straight right hand. Swole repeatedly whips Diamante with the kendo stick. Diamante kicks Swole in the face. Diamante with The Hurricanrana on the floor. Diamante whips Swole into the steel barricade. Diamante rolls Swole back into the ring. Diamante wraps a steel chain around her fist. Diamante delivers a gut punch. Diamante repeatedly whips Swole with the steel chain. Diamante talks smack to Swole. Diamante with forearm shivers. Tug Of War over the chain. Both ladies are knocked down after a double headbutt. Swole wraps the chain around her fist. Diamante decks Swole with a back elbow smash. Diamante drives Swole face first into the steel ring post. Diamante brings handcuffs into the ring. Swole with heavy bodyshots. Diamante answers with a knee lift. Swole knocks Diamante out with The Chain Assisted Dirty Dancing.

Winner: (32-13) Big Swole via Submission and Knockout 

Checkout Episode 273 of The Hoots Podcast