WWE Raw Results (3/28/22): The Tribal Chief Invades Pittsburgh

March 28, 2022
PPG Paints Arena
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

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Transcription by Josh Lopez

Brock Lesnar Promo 

Good evening, Pittsburgh. Your WWE Champion is in the house. I’m sorry, I got to do this. You see for the last 20 years, that loud mouth Paul Heyman has been doing the yapping for me, but I got to do this for you tonight. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Monday Night Raw. That felt good, but it felt like it sucked. I won’t be doing that again, but what I don’t suck at is handing out country ass kickings. You see, this Sunday at WrestleMania, I’m going to spoil my game plan to Roman here. I have a hard time doing it, but I’m just going to do it. See, Roman, this Sunday, this is a spoiler now, we’re going to take a trip down memory lane. Yeah, you can play along like that, if you want. We’re going to take a trip down the streets of Suplex City. And then I’m going to introduce you to the old beast of broadway.

After that, play along, that’s all right. We’re going to hit the carnival. We’re going to go for a ride on The F5. And ain’t nobody survives a ride on The F5. Yeah, Steve will be there too. He’s an ass kicker like me too. But he didn’t kick my ass. All right. Enough. After our carnival ride, now, this is where the party really starts. Roman, we’re going to hit a wedding. We’re gonna be Wedding Crashers. My title is going to marry your title. And it’s going to have a baby, the unified title. And I get full custody. Listen, yeah. I’m in a great mood tonight, because you know why, six days at WrestleMania, I finally get my hands on Roman Reigns. You see, there’s no more running, Roman. There’s nowhere to hide this Sunday, okay? This Sunday at WrestleMania, I’m going to stand above you with two titles, and I’m going to raise them to the sky, and they will chant, and new reigning, defending, unified Heavyweight Champion, Brock Lesnar.

First Match: Rey Mysterio w/Dominik Mysterio vs. The Miz w/Logan Paul

Dominik tackles Miz before the bell rings. Paul backs away from Rey. Dominik got ejected from the ringside area. Miz drives his knee into the midsection of Rey. Miz punches Rey in the back. Miz with a southpaw haymaker. Miz sends Rey to the corner. Rey dives over Miz. Rey kicks the left hamstring of Miz. Rey with clubbing blows to Miz’s back. Miz reverses out of the irish whip from Rey. Rey with a Tilt-A-Whirl Headscissors Takeover. Rey ducks a clothesline from Miz. Rey runs after Paul. Miz drives Rey back first into the ringside barricade. Miz hits The Implant DDT on the floor. Miz has complete control of the match during the commercial break.

Both men are fighting for position on the top turnbuckle. Rey is throwing haymakers at Miz. Rey HeadButts Miz. Rey with The Flying Seated Senton. Rey with a chop/forearm combination. Rey whips Miz across the ring. Miz goes for The Sunset Flip, but Rey counters with The Roundhouse Kick. Rey kicks Miz in the gut. Short-Arm Reversal by Miz. Miz with a toe kick. Miz goes for The Slingshot PowerBomb, but Rey counters with The Sunset Flip to pickup the victory. After the match, Dominik rolls Paul back into the ring. Rey gets Paul in position for The 619. Miz pulls Logan out of the ring. Dominik retrieves the stolen mask. Rey with a Hurricanrana into the middle rope. The Mysterio’s connects with The Double 619. The Mysterio’s plants Miz with Two Frog Splashes.

Winner: Rey Mysterio via Pinfall 

Second Match: Omos vs. The Viking Raiders In A Two On One Handicap Match  

Omos and Erik will start things off. Erik with heavy bodyshots. Omos sends Erik into the ropes. Erik ducks a clothesline from Omos. Erik with a forearm smash. Omos clotheslines Erik. Erik rolls out to the floor. Ivar tried to help Erik get back on his feet, but it was too late. The referee decided to count out Erik. After the match, Omos nails Ivar with The Roundhouse Kick. Kevin Patrick comes into the ring to interview Omos. Omos says that there’s nobody that can defeat him. Bobby Lashley walks down to the ring. It takes three running shoulder blocks to get Omos off of his feet.

Winner: Omos via Count-Out 

Roman Reigns Promo

Pittsburgh, Acknowledge Me. You see, I was going to come out here and I was gonna shine on you. I was going to talk about, you know, being the last needle mover, we was gonna talk about god mode, we was gonna talk about how I used to run Monday Night Raw, until Fox came begging for me to come save SmackDown. And those are fall facts. It’s all true. The Tribal Chief has done everything that you can do in this busines, you see, except one thing. If you all keep whatting me, I’m gonna smash all of y’all like I would Steve Austin. Just like I’m going to smash Brock Lesnar. So like I was saying, The Tribal Chief has done everything except beat the beast at WrestleMania and that pisses me off. Let’s talk about Brock, then, that’s what you want to do, talk about Brock. What really bothers me about Brock is just a couple weeks ago, he was out for blood. It was personal to him. But he’s already spilled my blood.

In 2018, at WrestleMania 34, he busted my head wide open, right here, one right here on the hairline, and one across the top of my skull and I bled all over New Orleans. He smashed my face to the point my children didn’t even recognize me. My wife didn’t want me in this business anymore. My father doubted me. My family was disappointed me. And then he comes out here, and it’s just a game now. We’re talking about Suplex City. It’s a carnival, it’s a wedding now, the title is gonna have babies now, it’s just a game. That’s all good because the Tribal Chief changed the game. We changed the game, and we’re going to take everything from him. You see, I already took his advocate and upgraded him to a Wiseman. I took his claim to being the longest reigning champion in the past 35 years. I got my receipt and I took his blood at Madison Square Garden. And this Sunday, I make the final move and I’m going to take his title. And then, Brock, you’re going to know what it’s going to be like to make it personal. Because I’m gonna make it personal. Because it’s always been personal to me.

Third Match: Sasha Banks, Naomi, Rhea Ripley and Liv Morgan vs. Queen Zelina, Carmella, Shayna Baszler and Natalya In A 8-Woman Tag Team Match

Liv Morgan and Natalya will start things off. Natalya with a double leg takedown. Morgan denies The Sharpshooter. Morgan ducks a clothesline from Natalya. Morgan with a Hurricanrana. Morgan with a Running Hip Attack. Morgan tags in Ripley. Following a snap mare takeover, Ripley with a running dropkick. Naomi tags herself in. Natalya with a straight right hand. Natalya tags in Baszler. Baszler with heavy bodyshots. Baszler tags in Vega. Vega repeatedly stomps on Naomi’s chest. Vega is choking Naomi with her boot. Vega poses for the crowd. Naomi with a JawBreaker. Naomi with a Running Bulldog into the middle turnbuckle pad. Naomi tags in Sasha. Double Splitting Boot for a two count. Naomi rocks Carmella with a forearm smash. Carmella kicks Naomi in the gut. Baszler with The Roundhouse Kick. Morgan with a Running Enzuigiri. Natalya responds with The Discus Lariat. Ripley HeadButts Natalya. Carmella SuperKicks Ripley. Sasha ducks a clothesline from Carmella. Sasha goes for The Backstabber, but Vega gets in the way.

Vega whips Sasha into the ringside barricade. Vega with a Running Knee Strike. Team Vega and Carmella has complete control of the match during this broadcast. Carmella applies a rear chin lock. Carmella drives her knee into the midsection of Sasha. Carmella sends Sasha to the corner. Sasha kicks Carmella in the face. Sasha is displaying her fighting spirit. Sasha hits The Backstabber. Baszler and Natalya pulls Ripley off the ring apron. Carmella tags in Baszler. Baszler blasts Naomi off the apron. Baszler with the irish whip. Sasha decks Baszler with a back elbow smash. Sasha kicks Baszler in the face. Baszler applies The Stretch Muffler. Simultaneous tag to Vega. Hart Attack. Vega dumps Natalya out of the ring. Vega hooks the outside leg for a two count. Baszler starts arguing with Vega. Carmella pulls Baszler out of the ring. Baszler punches Carmella. Sasha blocks a boot from Vega. Sasha tags in Naomi. Naomi with The Roundhouse Kick. Simultaneous tag to Morgan. Morgan with The Wing Snapper. Ripley connects with The Riptide to pickup the victory.

Winner: Sasha Banks, Naomi, Rhea Ripley and Liv Morgan via Pinfall 

Kevin Owens Promo 

Wow, what a piece of footage. There is nobody who does video packages than the WWE. It was nothing compared to my tribute to Stone Cold Steve Austin last week. You all saw it. That was amazing. And you know I heard people, I heard people saying that somehow, I was mocking Stone Cold, and you know what, those are lies. What? I said those are lies. What? I said that people were lying. That was me paying homage to the great Stone Cold we all love and remember. And you know, I know everyone is absolutely ecstatic that Stone Cold Steve Austin is my guest on The KO Show in the main event of WrestleMania, Saturday, and so am I. Okay. I am. But look, last week, that wasn’t just me paying tribute to Stone Cold. That was also me doing everybody watching a favor because you see that, last Monday night, me being dressed up as Steve Austin, that’s the closest we will ever get to the old Stone Cold we used to admire, okay? Because that Stone Cold, he’s gone, he has been gone for 19 years. What? He has been gone for 19 years. What? 19 years and he ain’t ever coming back.

Yeah, WrestleMania on The KO Show, it’s not going to be Stone Cold. It’s going to be Steve. It’s not Stone Cold anymore. It’s Steve. Okay, and that’s cool. It’s cool. It’s Steve, the same Steve that’s been drinking himself into an oblivion for 19 years now. The same Steve who is so bored to tears on his stupid ranch, that he is begging everybody, please, can you come on my little podcast so we can talk about the old days and make me feel good again. Hey, but look, that Steve, he still sounds like Stone Cold, he still looks like Stone Cold. We saw that video of him, right, of him in front of his little golf cart. It was heavily edited, I’m sure, but he still looks and sounds like Stone Cold. He even still talks a big game like Stone Cold because he knows he has to but let me tell you all something. Steve is coming to the KO Show to pick a fight with me because he knows damn well what would happen if he picked a fight with Kevin Owens. He’s coming to the KO Show to have another nice little conversation about his career, he wants to have a nice little chat, and you know what, Steve, I’m so honored and and happy that you accepted my invitation that I will do that for you. I’m a good person. I will give you the I will give you the biggest platform you’ve ever had in your career on the WrestleMania main event edition of The KO Show. So we can talk about you, make you feel good, and give you the little sendoff you think you deserve.

You know what? I’m even going to do something very special for you, see, because I hate beer. It’s disgusting. I’m going to drink one with you, okay. We’re going to sit down together in the middle of the ring at AT&T Stadium and drink. We’re going to drink together, right, we can toast. You know what, that’s perfect. We will toast. We will toast to you, Steve Austin, finally officially passing the torch to me, not only as the new Stone Cold, but the one true master of The Stunner. Because Owens 3:16 says, my stunner is better than yours. If you think my stunner is better than Stone Cold’s, give me a hell yeah. And then once that’s done, Steve, you can be on your way. Doesn’t that sound perfect. It does. But Steve, just one little friendly warning, if you try to get funny with me, there’s going to be a stunner but you will be on the receiving end of it. Oh, hell yeah. Let me repeat that to make sure you heard me loud and clear. Steve, if you try to pick a fight with me on The KO Show, I will end up pouring one of your very own beers on to your lifeless carcass after I open up a can of whoop ass on you. And that’s the bottom like because KO said so.

Fourth Match: Ricochet vs. Austin Theory 

Theory kicks Ricochet in the gut. Theory with a forearm smash. Theory repeatedly stomps on Ricochet’s chest. Theory with The Fallaway Slam. Ricochet push kicks Theory. Ricochet with The Roll Through Dropkick. Ricochet with a running elbow smash. Ricochet sends Theory to the corner. Ricochet with a running shoulder block. Ricochet slams Theory’s head on the top turnbuckle pad.

Ricochet pump kicks the top turnbuckle pad into Theory’s face. Ricochet with a SpringBoard Clothesline. Ricochet with The Standing Shooting Star Press for a two count. Theory avoids The Recoil. Theory goes for The ATL, but Ricochet lands back on his feet. Ricochet ducks a clothesline from Theory. Ricochet with a Step Up Enzuigiri. Theory knocks Ricochet off the top turnbuckle. Theory connects with The ATL to pickup the victory.

Winner: Austin Theory via Pinfall 

Becky Lynch & Bianca BelAir Segment 

Fifth Match: Drew McIntyre vs. Baron Corbin & Riddick Moss In A Two On One Handicap Match 

Drew McIntyre and Baron Corbin will start things off. Collar and Elbow Tie Up. McIntyre sends Corbin into the ropes. Corbin shoves McIntyre. Corbin tags out to Moss. McIntyre throws Moss into the ring. McIntyre clotheslines Moss. McIntyre launches Moss to the corner. McIntyre with a haymaker/stomp combination. McIntyre tees off on Moss. McIntyre with an Overhead Belly to Belly Suplex.

McIntyre ducks a clothesline from Moss. McIntyre with a Leaping NeckBreaker. McIntyre pops back on his feet. McIntyre throws Moss into the turnbuckles. McIntyre tells Corbin to bring it. Corbin walks up the ramp way instead. McIntyre HeadButts Moss. McIntyre connects with The Claymore to pickup the victory. After the match, Corbin immediately attacks McIntyre from behind. Corbin transitions into a ground and pound attack. Corbin repeatedly drives McIntyre shoulder first into the steel ring post. Corbin plants McIntyre with The End Of Days. Corbin walks away with McIntyre’s sword.

Winner: Drew McIntyre via Pinfall 

Edge Promo 

Last week on Raw, I had a choice to make. Do I blast Seth Rollins with a chair and give him another beating this Sunday at WrestleMania, one that he deserves? And it’s very tempting, or do I let fate take its course. But like I’ve talked about recently, I’ve decide to take fate into my own hands and it made me realize, AJ, it’s serendipity, it needed to be you. AJ, we need each other. You needed to pull off the veil of mediocrity that you placed on your own head, to remind you that you were an era defending superstar in this industry.

You’re welcome, by the way. I, on the other hand, I needed you to become what I’ve become. I am a wild light, blinding bright. I am the benchmark of the WWE. We’ve already pushed each other to better places, AJ, only I will keep soaring, and you will stay where you are. This Sunday, at WrestleMania, finally after over 20 years of running parallel, collecting championships wherever we’ve gone, blowing the roofs off of arena’s worldwide, you and I will face off on the grandest stage of them all, for the first time ever, in a match for the ages. But AJ, I saw the look in your eyes Monday, and I realized I’m roaming inside of your head. This Sunday at WrestleMania, AJ, it’s your judgment day. Under judgment, it’s sealed.

Updated WrestleMania 38 Match Card 

Night One 

– The New Day vs. Sheamus & Ridge Holland w/Butch

– Drew McIntyre vs. Baron Corbin w/Riddick Moss

– The Mysterio Family vs. The Miz & Logan Paul

– The Usos (c) vs. Shinsuke Nakamura & Rick Boogs For The WWE SmackDown Tag Team Championship

– The Kevin Owens Show With Special Guest: Stone Cold Steve Austin

– Becky Lynch (c) vs. Bianca BelAir For The WWE RAW Women’s Championship

– Charlotte Flair (c) vs. Ronda Rousey For The WWE SmackDown Women’s Championship

– Seth Rollins vs. TBD

Night Two

– Edge vs. AJ Styles

– Randy Orton & Matt Riddle (c) vs. The Street Profits vs. The Alpha Academy In A Triple Threat Match For The WWE Raw Tag Team Championship

– Bobby Lashley w/MVP vs. Omos

– Sami Zayn vs. Johnny Knoxville In A No Disqualification Match

– Pat McAfee vs. Austin Theory

– Queen Zelina & Carmella (c) vs. Sasha Bank & Naomi vs. Rhea Ripley & Liv Morgan vs. Shayna Baszler & Natalya In A Fatal Four Way Match For The WWE Women’s Tag Team Championship

– Roman Reigns (c) w/Paul Heyman vs. Brock Lesnar (c) In A Winner Takes All Match For The WWE Championship & WWE Universal Championship

Sixth Match: Randy Orton & Matt Riddle vs. The Usos 

Shinsuke Nakamura and Rick Boogs are watching this match in the ringside area. Randy Orton and Jimmy Uso will start things off. Orton kicks Jimmy in the gut. Orton uppercuts Jimmy. Jimmy with a chop/forearm combination. Orton answers with the greco roman eye poke. Orton uppercuts Jimmy. Orton tags in Riddle. Assisted Floating BRO. Misfired SuperKicks and RKO’s. The Usos taunts Nakamura and Boogs. Riddle slams Jey’s head on the announce table. RK-Bro with Two Belly to Back Suplex’s on the announce table. The Usos regains control of the match during the commercial break. Jimmy sends Orton to the corner. Orton clotheslines Jimmy. Orton delivers The Garvin Stomp. Orton tags in Riddle. Riddle with The Mid-Kick. Riddle with a GutWrench Suplex. Riddle applies a front face lock. Jey tags himself in.

Jey with a flying forearm smash. Jey applies a front face lock. Riddle teep kicks Jey into the turnbuckles. Riddle with three flying forearm smashes. Riddle with The Exploder Suplex. Riddle follows that with The BROTon for a one count. Jey reverses out of the irish whip from Riddle. Riddle dives over Jey. Jey avoids The Roundhouse Kick. Jey hits The Samoan Drop for a two count. Jey tags in Jimmy. Jey repeatedly stomps on Riddle’s chest. Jimmy transitions into a ground and pound attack. Jimmy puts his knee on the back of Riddle’s neck. Jey kicks Riddle in the face. The referee is trying to calm down Orton. Jimmy tags in Jey. Wish Bone Attack. Jey uses the middle rope as a weapon. Jimmy delivers a cheap shot behind the referee’s back. Jey applies a front face lock. Riddle with forearm shivers. Jey slaps Riddle in the ribs. Jey sends Riddle face first into the top turnbuckle pad. Jey tags in Jimmy. Jimmy applies a rear chin lock. Jimmy tags in Jey. Jey stomps on the midsection of Riddle. Riddle is displaying his fighting spirit. Jimmy made the blind tag.

Short-Arm Reversal by Jey. Jimmy with an Apron Enzuigiri. Jey dropkicks Riddle to the floor. Jimmy launches Riddle into the time keepers area. Jey ducks a clothesline from Riddle. Jey with an Elevated NeckBreaker. Jey taunts Orton. Riddle nails Jey with a Pump Knee Strike. Orton and Jimmy are tagged in. Orton with two clotheslines. Orton ducks a clothesline from Jimmy. Orton goes for The Powerslam, but Jimmy holds onto the ropes. Jey made the blind tag. Orton Powerslams Jimmy. Orton goes for The Draping DDT, but Jey rolls him over for a two count. Orton ducks a clothesline from Jey. Orton Powerslams Jey. Orton goes for The Draping DDT, but Jimmy gets in the way. Riddle blasts Jimmy with The PK. Riddle with a Twisting Pescado to the outside. Orton connects with The Draping DDT. Orton prepares for The RKO. The Street Profits attacks Orton from behind which causes the disqualification. After the match, all hell starts breaking loose in Pittsburgh. Riddle drops Dawkins with The RKO. Ford dives over Riddle. RK-BRO plants Dawkins with Two More RKO’s to close the show.

Winner: Randy Orton & Matt Riddle via Disqualification 

Checkout Episode 302 of The Hoots Podcast 

Author: Josh Lopez