WWE Raw Results (3/16/20): Happy 316 Day !!!

March 16, 2020
WWE Performance Center
Orlando, Florida

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Transcription by Josh Lopez 

Edge Promo

You know, it’s been a few strange few months for my wife Beth and I, roll the footage. It’s been a long time coming hasn’t it? And when your dad introduce me to this young face fresh athlete 21 years ago, I knew Randy. My gut was telling me that everything from that moment was going to change. Our paths. Ours careers. We’re gonna intertwine. Stealing the show for the Intercontinental Championship. Forming Rated RKO to destroy DX, I was proven right. All those roads, up and down all of the roads, exchanging stories, finding out that we dislike the same people. Hell, we even owed the same man credit. Credit for pushing us to what our capabilities can be. That man’s name is Mick Foley. See, Mick Foley wanted to push us, show us what we can do, hand the torch to us. Randy, we grabbed it. We did, but there was one lesson I took from Mick that you didn’t. You clearly did not take this lesson. That lesson was, grit.

The grit I needed to stand up after nine years, after the neck surgery’s, the wrist surgery’s, everything to stand back up and come back here once again and be at the Royal Rumble. See, we’re a lot alike, but we have one major difference and that’s the fact that, you are an entitled brat. Don’t get me wrong, you’re one of the best, maybe the best to ever do this, I can’t take that away from you. But you had all this handed to you on a silver platter. When your dad brought you to that WWE live event, he handed you all of this and it kills you. It makes you so jealous, that a guy like me, had to work for everything and got it. I didn’t have it handed to me. I was raised by a single parent, who broke her back to make sure that my visions, that my dreams can come true and they did. And it makes you jealous that at the Royal Rumble, I came back after nine years and I threw you out. That’s what this is really all about. This isn’t love, you don’t love me Randy, you’re jealous. You are jealous because you can’t do what I do and that tears you apart. So, two weeks ago, Beth comes back to give a medical update on me.

And what no one realizes, what you didn’t realize Randy was that, she was here to retire for me again. She didn’t think that it was fair that someone should be forced to retire from what they love, from what they’re meant to do, not only once but twice. You just couldn’t let her finish, couldn’t you Randy? No, you couldn’t let her finish what she was going to say. You talked about all those years I pulled you out of holes, I stopped you from making horrible decision after decision. Randy, you pulled me out of a hole. A hole that you dug for me. You pulled me away from making a horrible decision. So Randy, it’s pretty simple now man. At WrestleMania, if you got the guts and I’m looking at you right now. If you got the guts, Edge versus Randy Orton in a Last Man Standing Match. Randy, this is not a story that you dictate. This is not a story that you write. I write this story man and this story is not a tragedy man, this is a redemption story. At WrestleMania, you won’t stand back up.

– Replay of The 2020 Men’s Royal Rumble Match.

Undertaker & AJ Styles In-Ring Segment 

AJ Styles: Hey Taker, you’re looking for this contract? Yeah, I have it right here. Yea it was me who challenged you to a match on the grandest stage of them all, but as luck would have it, here we are in the Performance Center in Orlando, Florida, where hundreds of prospects come through these doors, hoping to be just like you. I mean, we didn’t go to the performance center. We didn’t have to, we went straight to the top, but you sir are a legend. You are on the Mount Rushmore of WWE Superstars. You carried this company on your back, but it’s 2020 and you keep interjecting yourself into a world that would rather see you removed from it.

I mean, come on, you don’t see Michael Jordan interjecting himself into the NBA Finals, do you? How about Peyton Manning or Brett Favre, you don’t seem them interjecting themselves into the Super Bowl? It just doesn’t happen. But you can sure as hell bet that, The Undertaker is going to interject himself into WrestleMania season. What a surprise, but again I think I know who’s fault this is. It’s your wife, Michelle McCool, oh Money Michelle that’s what they call her, right. She helps you dust off that crusty jacket/hat, watches you walk down the aisle and embarrass yourself. Undertaker, Mark, you’re a shell of your former self. That flame you once had Mark, it’s totally gone. Let it go. And somewhere in this brain, I feel like something should be telling me like, hey, take it easy man, have a little sympathy for the old guy. I can’t find it. It’s not there and i’ll tell you why.

Because not once, but twice, you have stuck your nose into OC business. The Gauntlet Match, Super ShowDown, you stole that victory. And then at Elimination Chamber, my no disqualification match, I should’ve seen that coming, you cost me that victory too. You see, at WrestleMania, the lights can go out, but you can’t hide. And we know you can’t run. So when it’s over, when WrestleMania is over, I will gladly pay for your assistant living cost. I mean, i’m kinda doing everyone a favor when I finally have you rest in peace. Let me sign this. All right boys, do me a favor, take this to The Undertaker. What are you scared? You’re the toughest men in the building. You want me to take it? You know what. Karl, you take it. And Big LG, you go with him.

The OC slides the contract into the ring. The lights go out in the Performance Center. Taker is standing behind The OC. Taker bull rushes The OC into the edge of the ring frame. Taker whips Anderson into the steel ring steps. Taker tees off on Gallows. Styles is furious in the backstage area. Taker shoves Anderson into the ringside barricade. Taker kicks Anderson in the face. Gallows suffers the same treatment. Taker signs the contract to close the segment. Taker shoves the contract down Anderson’s throat.

Andrade Cien Almas w/Zelina Vega vs. Rey Mysterio

Asuka joins the commentary team for this match. Mysterio sends Almas to the middle rope. Almas applies a waist lock. Almas with a waist lock takedown. Almas stomps on Mysterio’s back. Almas kicks Mysterio in the chest. Almas with a Sliding Dropkick. Almas continues to stomp on Mysterio’s back. Almas with a short elbow drop. Almas blasts Mysterio with a knife edge chop. Almas shoots Mysterio off the ropes. Mysterio kicks Almas in the chest. Mysterio with Two OverHand Chops. Mysterio follows that with a SpringBoard HeadScissors TakeOver.

Almas launches Mysterio over the top rope. Mysterio with a shoulder block. Vega trips Mysterio from the outside. Mysterio with an Apron Enzuigiri. Almas dropkicks Mysterio in mid-air for a two count. Almas has complete control of the match during the commercial break. Almas applies The Vertebrae Stretch. Almas gets Mysterio in the electric chair position. Mysterio with a Hurricanrana that sends Almas shoulder first into the steel ring post. Mysterio with a SpringBoard Seated Senton.

Mysterio follows that with a Tilt-A-Whirl HeadScissors TakeOver. Almas goes for a sunset flip, but Mysterio counters with a RoundHouse Kick for a two count. Almas catches Mysterio in mid-air. Almas goes for a Vertical Suplex, but Mysterio lands back on his feet. Mysterio drop toe holds Almas into the middle rope. Mysterio goes for The 619, but Almas counters with The Discus Back Elbow Smash for a two count. Almas talks smack to Mysterio. Almas hits The Two Amigos. Mysterio responds with a Hurricanrana. Mysterio connects with The 619. Mysterio lands The Frog Splash to pickup the victory.

Winner: Rey Mysterio via Pinfall 

– Video package on Shayna Baszler winning the Elimination Chamber Match

Becky Lynch Promo 

Shayna, this one’s for you cause I know you’re watching. I know you’re listening. I know you’re lasered in on me cause my existence drives you crazy. As long as I carry this, nothing in your world makes sense, does it? Because you have been taught, you’ve been trained that you can just bully your way to the top. You did it in NXT for two straight years. But then you see on Raw, you see this loud, ginger, absolute legend of an irish woman and it just makes you question the whole natural order of things. As long as i’m the champion, your whole world is alive. Now, let me explain this, in terms that animals like you could even understand. See, i’m the one that was hunted and got tired of being hunted. I’m the prey that kills its predators, Shayna.

So don’t make the mistake that all the rest of them did. Every word, every action, every tweet, every interview, it’s all design to make you think exactly what I want you to think of me. See, you can walk around with your little mouth guard and cold dead eyes all you like. You can cut through the rest of the division, but you know i’m a whole different proposition and it rages you and all your little buddies. But I want you to do something that you never do Shayna, I want you to think. I want you think of how it’s going to feel when I beat you. Cause I watched you demolish the entire division at Elimination Chamber and it woke me up to a little bit of reality. At WrestleMania, i’m gonna prove that your whole life is a lie and it’s going to hit you like a truck.

Charly Caruso Interviews Kevin Owens  

WrestleMania 36 Match Card

– Becky Lynch (c) vs. Shayna Baszler For The WWE Raw Women’s Championship

– John Cena vs. “The Fiend” Bray Wyatt

– The Undertaker vs. AJ Styles

– Rhea Ripley (c) vs. Charlotte Flair For The WWE NXT Women’s Championship

– Goldberg (c) vs. Roman Reigns For The WWE Universal Championship

– Brock Lesnar (c) w/Paul Heyman vs. Drew McIntyre For The WWE Championship

– Kevin Owens vs. Seth Rollins

– Edge vs. Randy Orton in a Last Man Standing Match

Stone Cold Steve Austin Promo 

Checkout Episode 196 of The Hoots Podcast 

Author: Josh Lopez