WWE SmackDown Results (3/13/26): Cody Rhodes & Randy Orton WrestleMania Contract Signing

WWE SmackDown Results 3/13/26
Mortgage Matchup Center
Phoenix, Arizona

You can follow me on Twitter @TheHootsPodcast

Commentators: (Joe Tessitore & Wade Barrett)

Ring Announcer: Mark Nash

Transcription by Josh Lopez

Drew McIntyre, Nick Aldis, Jacob Fatu Segment 

Drew McIntyre: Aldis, Aldis, you can take that contract and shove it up your ass. Move. Did you see what happened last week? My damn title was stolen from me. You couldn’t help yourself, could you, Nick? You had to make sure your golden boy, Cody Rhodes, got the title match before WrestleMania. You’re gonna get out here, right now, and you’re gonna make this right. I’ll stay out here all night long.

Nick Aldis: Let me explain this to you in plain English. There is nothing to make right. Part of being champion, as you well know is defending the championship, and I made you do that in a fair a one-on-one contest. A contest in which, by the way, you headbutted a referee, and it still didn’t go your way, and now you’re out here playing the victim, again. Drew, you’re looking for somebody to blame, what you should really be looking at are the consequences of your own actions.

Drew McIntyre: The consequences of my actions? Yeah, beside the fact Jacob got involved, you had to make the match with Cody. Yeah, yeah, yeah, even though we had a deal, he lost the Royal Rumble, he lost at the Elimination Chamber, but you had to make sure the corporate champion got his belt, right, you corporate stooge.

Nick Aldis: Don’t you dare call me that, you know who I am, and you know where I came from. You want to talk about the Rumble, you want to talk about the Chamber, oh, being those two matches where you screwed Cody out of his shot, real rich for the guy who claims to keep getting screwed. So, you listen to me, you did everything you could to prevent Cody from getting a fair shot, and now I understand why, because the first time he got one, he beat you.

Drew McIntyre: You know it, and I know it, this is bullshit. Now, you’re gonna make this right or else.

Jacob Fatu: Yadadamean? Fix? Fix what, huh, Drew? You wouldn’t even be champion if it wasn’t for me, so let’s state the facts. I fixed the situation last week, so Drew McIntyre is no longer champion. So, this isn’t about him, this isn’t about Cody, this isn’t about anybody else. So, you’re pointing fingers, you’re blaming people, blaming the ref, blaming Nick, blaming everybody else. But let’s keep it 100 with you, I’m the one that screwed y’all ass. So, let me break it down to you, Drew, what the hell you gonna do about it?

Drew McIntyre: What I’m gonna do about it? You wanna know what I’m gonna do about it? You, Nick, Cody, these people, I’m done with you all. I quit.

McIntyre leaves through the crow to close this segment.

– We see Solo Sikoa talking to The MFT’s in the backstage area. Their plan worked out perfectly last week. The Wyatt Sicks are not the number one contenders, and they still don’t have the lantern, but the job isn’t done. Tonight, Solo and Talla Tonga are gonna take care of Erick Rowan and Uncle Howdy. Solo tells Tama Tonga to guard the lantern with his life. Remember, without the lantern, The Wyatt’s are nothing. As The MFT’s start walking away, Tama turns around and sees Shinsuke Nakamura. Nakamura wants to know when is Tama finally going to be his own man? Solo comes back and tells Nakamura to stay the hell away from his family before he gets hurt.

– Coming out of the commercial break, we see Nick Aldis talking to Jacob Fatu in the back. Nick doesn’t know what to tell Jacob after Drew McIntyre decided to quit. Jacob says that Drew quits right as he was about to whoop his ass. Speaking of whoop, Trick Williams interrupts the conversation. Trick says that he’s the only one who does the whooping around here, time for Jacob to get his own material, dog. Trick says that grown folk is talking. Trick wants to know when’s Nick going to do his job. Jacob tells Trick to shut the hell up. The only job Trick has is Jacob kicking his ass. Nick is trying to defuse the situation. Jacob is no longer being disrespected and walks away. Trick says what does Jacob know about disrespect, is Nick going to let him talk to Trick Willy like that? What happened with Trick and Randy Orton last week was very disrespectful. Trick tells Nick to do his job. Nick informs Trick that he’ll be going one-on-one with Jacob Fatu. Nick says that if Trick wants to be the second person without a job, he better go prepare for his match. Trick says that Nick is something else.

First Match: Solo Sikoa & Talla Tonga w/The MFT’s vs. The Wyatt Sicks 

Talla Tonga and Erick Rowan will start things off. Shoulder Block Exchange. Tonga uppercuts Rowan. Tonga drops Rowan with a shoulder tackle. Tonga poses for the crowd. Tonga stomps on Rowan’s chest. Tonga HeadButts Rowan. Tonga uses the middle rope to choke Rowan. Tonga tags in Solo. Solo HeadButts Rowan. Solo runs into Rowan. Rowan answers with a rebound shoulder tackle. Rowan tags in Howdy. Howdy clotheslines the back of Solo’s neck. Howdy repeatedly stomps on Solo’s chest. Howdy with a corner clothesline. Solo uppercuts Howdy. Solo with two haymakers. Solo tags in Tonga. Howdy is displaying his fighting spirit. Howdy with rapid fire haymakers. Tonga pulls Howdy out of the ring. Tonga slams Howdy’s head on the ring apron and the announce table. Tonga throws Howdy into the ringside barricade. The MFT’s are fired up. Tonga resets the referee’s ten count. Tonga with The World’s Strongest Slam onto the announce table. Tonga HeadButts Howdy. Tonga stomps on Howdy’s back. Tonga uppercuts Howdy. Tonga whips Howdy across the ring.

Tonga scores the elbow knockdown. Tonga with a Running Elbow Drop. Tonga tags in Solo. Solo taunts Rowan. Solo with repeated headbutts. Solo with a straight right hand. Solo chokes Howdy with the middle rope. Tonga uppercuts Howdy from the outside. Solo applies a nerve hold. Howdy with forearm shivers. Solo drops Howdy with The Spinning Solo for a two count. Solo tags in Tonga. Howdy attacks the midsection of Tonga. Tonga slaps Howdy in the chest. Tonga sends Howdy to the corner. Tonga levels Howdy with The Body Avalanche. Tonga with a Running Samoan Drop for a two count. Tonga tags in Solo. Solo goes for The Sister’s Abigail, but Howdy counters with a Belly to Back Suplex. Rowan and Tonga are tagged in. Rowan with a series of haymakers. Tonga reverses out of the irish whip from Rowan. Rowan drops Tonga with The DDT. Tonga rises back on his feet. Rowan dropkicks Tonga. Rowan with a running back elbow smash. Rowan knocks Solo off the apron.

Tonga kicks Rowan in the face. Rowan ducks a clothesline from Tonga. Rowan with a Running Crossbody Block. Rowan with a Diving Elbow Strike for a two count. Rowan plays to the crowd. Tonga fights out of the fireman’s carry position. Solo made the blind tag. Solo with The Apron Enzuigiri. Tonga with a Lariat. Solo goes for a Flying Splash, but Rowan gets his knees up in the air. Rowan tags in Howdy. Solo denies The Sister’s Abigail. Solo delivers The Samoan Spike for a two count. Tonga clotheslines Rowan over the top rope. Both guys are knocked down after a double clothesline on the floor. All hell starts breaking loose at ringside. Solo wipes out Gacy and Lumis with a pair of Samoan Spikes. Solo slides back into the ring. Solo prepares for another Samoan Spike. Solo gets distracted by Nikki Cross who runs off with the lantern. Howdy connects with The Sister’s Abigail to pickup the victory. After the match, Uncle Howdy celebrates with the lantern. Tama Tonga clocks Howdy with The Cutthroat. The MFT’s once again escape with the lantern.

Winner: The Wyatt Sicks via Pinfall 

– Damian Priest and R-Truth were watching the match on a monitor. Priest says that The MFT’s are going to be pretty tough competition. Truth mistakes The MFT’s for The Judgment Day, they can’t let their history with Judgment Day cloud their judgment and cost them the WWE Tag Team Champions. Truth calls JC Mateo, JC McDonagh and he’s been eating a lot. Tom & Nick also put on some muscle. Priest tells Truth that they’re going to become tag team champions after they fight The MFT’s. Los Garza joins the conversation. Angel says that Priest and Truth only won because of them, and because they did the heavy lifting during last week’s Tag Team Turmoil Match. Priest says that he’s gonna go talk to Nick Aldis, and they can have a match later on tonight.

Giulia & Kiana James Promo 

Kiana James: Tiffany, you talk a big game, but talking only gets you so far.

Giulia: Tiffany, you really think you deserve this title? You can’t even beat Kiana tonight, let alone me.

Kiana James: I have zero issues with shutting you up tonight and proving that Tiffy Time expired.

Second Match: Jade Cargill vs. Michin w/B-Fab 

Michin attacks Cargill before the bell rings. Michin with clubbing blows to Cargill’s back. Michin with a Spinning Back Kick. Michin follows that with a Roundhouse Kick. Cargill regroups on the outside. The referee finally rings the bell. Michin ducks a clothesline from Cargill. Michin dropkicks Cargill towards the corner. Michin with a chop/forearm combination. Cargill sends Michin to the corner. Michin kicks Cargill in the face. Michin with The Flying Hurricanrana. Michin plays to the crowd. Michin lands The Suicide Dive. Michin is fired up. Michin rolls Cargill back into the ring. Cargill nails Michin with The Pump Kick. Cargill tugs on Michin’s hair. Cargill bodyslams Michin. Cargill stomps on Michin’s chest. Cargill kicks Michin in the back. Cargill repeatedly stomps on Michin’s chest. Cargill is choking Michin with her boot. Cargill with a sharp knee strike. Cargill toys around with Michin. Cargill and Michin are trading back and forth shots. Cargill hammers down on the back of Michin’s neck.

Michin does the spider man pose on the ropes. Michin sends Cargill tumbling to the floor. Michin blasts Cargill with The PK. Cargill catches Michin mid-air. Cargill with The Fallaway Slam on the floor. Cargill pops back on her feet. Cargill has complete control of the match during the commercial break. Cargill whips Michin across the ring. Cargill drops Michin with The SpineBuster for a two count. Cargill goes for The Chokeslam, but Michin blocks it. Cargill goes for The Jaded, but Michin counters with The Stunner. Michin with a Tornado DDT for a two count. Michin applies a wrist lock. Cargill blocks Eat Defeat. Michin with an Overhead Kick. Michin hits The Slice Bread. Michin connects with Eat Defeat. Cargill’s momentum brought her to the outside. Michin goes for a Cannonball Senton off the ring apron, Cargill ducks out of the way. Cargill PowerBombs Michin on the timekeeper’s barricade. Cargill rolls Michin back into the ring. Cargill licks Michin’s face. Cargill Chokeslams Michin. Cargill plants Michin with The Jaded to pickup the victory. After the match, Cargill snatches the microphone out of the hands of Cathy Kelley who was just trying to conduct a post-match interview.

Jade Cargill: Hold up, hold up. Y’all seen that? That is what happens when these wrestlers believe in their own hype. Now, all these women backstage know what it is, when they see me in these hallways, they get real quiet. But for some reason, the world tells me that I should be scared of one woman, Rhea Ripley. And for some reason, I keep thinking, getting scared for what? Who? I’m me. And what am I afraid of? I don’t see a challenger, I don’t see a threat, and I ain’t never been afraid of nothing my whole damn life, and I’m damn sure ain’t starting today. So, Rhea, I’m gonna beat your ass come WrestleMania, and I’m going to show you why I’m always on top.

Rhea Ripley walks down to the ring. Ripley begs Cargill to hit her. Cargill walks out of the ring.

Rhea Ripley: You’re out here running your mouth, but now you want to run from a fight with me. You’re not the embodiment of female empowerment, no, no, no. You’re not THE, you’re not even A, but after WrestleMania, you’re gonna be my bitch.

Winner: Jade Cargill via Pinfall 

– Cody Rhodes runs into Nick Aldis in the backstage area. Cody wants to know what’s going on with the Drew McIntyre Situation. Nick doesn’t know, it’s Drew McIntyre, so he’s gotta figure it out, but he wants Cody to just focus on tonight’s contract signing. Cody looked at the contract, and it’s all in order. Nick tells Cody that he’ll see him out there. Sami Zayn joins the conversation. Sami doesn’t want this to turn into another argument, he’s just here to say congratulations. For whatever it’s worth, Sami is rooting for Cody at WrestleMania. Cody doesn’t want to make this a thing either, but Sami said the exact same thing to Randy Orton last week. They keep crossing paths, let’s just get to the root of this. If Sami is looking for a title shot on the backside of WrestleMania from Randy Orton, he’ll probably get it. But for Cody, he hasn’t even wrestled Randy at WrestleMania. Cody apologies for being short with Sami, if anybody deserves a title shot, it’s Sami. They could go walk into Nick’s office right now and get Sami a title shot, because he’s Sami Zayn.

Is that what this is about? Does Sami Zayn want a title shot? Sami can’t believe that Cody thinks so lowly of him. Sami said what he said to Randy Orton, because he’s Randy Orton. Randy Orton is one of one, a 14x World Time Champion, there will never be another Randy Orton in this business. Sami looks up to Randy, but he doesn’t look up to Cody Rhodes. The reason for that is because they’re friends, and friends are supposed to be equals. Yeah, Cody may be walking into the main event of WrestleMania again, but in Sami’s eyes, they’re equals, so he’s not allowed to talk down to him like that. Cody says that he’s not talking down to Sami. Cody spent this whole past week doing media and saying how magical Sami is, because he looks up to him. What is this about? Sami doesn’t look up to Cody, fine, he doesn’t need to, he could just look at the WWE Championship. Sami snaps after Cody walks away. We can hear Zelina Vega laughing in the background. She appears with Aleister Black. All this chasing the World Championship, did Sami ever think this wasn’t meant for him? Sami tells Aleister that he needs to stay far away from him, does he understand. Zelina says all that anger is not good for Sami.

– Coming out of the commercial break, Rhea Ripley checks on Michin outside the Trainer’s Room. Rhea gives Michin props for her performance tonight. Michin says congratulations to Rhea for winning the Women’s Elimination Chamber. Michin tells Rhea that, if Jade Cargill didn’t go after her shoulder, they would be having a different conversation, so she doesn’t want any pity parties. B-Fab tells Rhea that Michin needs a second to cool down.

Third Match: The Irresistible Forces (c) vs. Charlotte Flair & Alexa Bliss For The WWE Women’s Tag Team Championship 

The Bella Twins come down to the ring before The Irresistible Forces made their entrance.

Brie Bella: Phoenix, Bella Army, feels good to be back on SmackDown in our hometown.

Nikki Bella: Right. Oh, hi Charlotte, hi Alexa. So, as much as we would love to wish you both luck in your match tonight, that’s not the reason why we’re here.

Brie Bella: No, it’s not, because no matter who wins this match, and walks out as the champions, The Bellas came back for gold, and we’re next in line for the Women’s Tag Titles.

Nikki Bella: So, tonight, we’re gonna be sitting right over there, watching ringside, so we can get a good look at our competition.

The Irresistible Forces jumps Charlotte and Alexa before the bell rings. Jax is choking Alexa with her boot. Legend slams Charlotte’s head on the top turnbuckle pad. Charlotte decks Legend with a back elbow smash. Stereo Boots from Charlotte and Alexa. Charlotte and Alexa send Jax tumbling to the floor. Charlotte and Alexa avoids the double clothesline and dropkicks Legend to the floor. Jax catches Alexa in mid-air. Jax dumps Alexa face first on the ring apron. Charlotte with The Slingshot Pescado. Legend responds with The Pump Kick on the floor. Legend hugs Jax. Irresistible Forces talks smack to The Bellas at ringside. Jax rolls Alexa back into the ring. Jax HeadButts Alexa. Jax mocks Nikki Bella. Alexa kicks the left knee of Jax. Alexa with heavy bodyshots. Alexa kicks the left hamstring of Jax. Jax clotheslines Alexa. Jax slams Alexa’s head on the top turnbuckle pad. Jax tags in Legend. Legend stomps on the midsection of Alexa. Following a snap mare takeover, Legend with a Running Elbow Drop for a two count. Legend applies a wrist lock. Alexa punches Legend in the ribs. Legend drives her knee into the midsection of Alexa. Legend lifts Alexa up in the air. Legend clotheslines Alexa for a two count.

Legend tags in Jax. Jax with a gut punch. Jax uses the middle rope to choke Alexa. Alexa avoids The Body Avalanche. Alexa attacks the midsection of Jax. Jax HeadButts Alexa. Jax knocks Charlotte off the apron. The referee is trying to calm down Charlotte. Legend attacks Alexa behind the referee’s back. Legend tags herself in. Legend with clubbing blows to Alexa’s chest. Jax with a Sidewalk Slam. Legend follows that with a Big Splash for a two count. Alexa decks Legend with a JawBreaker. Alexa kicks Legend in the face. Legend stops Alexa in her tracks. Legend sends Alexa to the corner. Alexa is displaying her fighting spirit. Legend catches Alexa in mid-air. Legend goes for The Lawn Dart, but Alexa lands back on her feet. Alexa rolls under a clothesline from Legend. Alexa tags in Charlotte. Charlotte with The Flying Crossbody Block. Charlotte kicks Jax off the apron. Charlotte unloads a series of knife edge chops. Legend shoves Charlotte. Charlotte ducks a clothesline from Legend. Charlotte with The Walkover Lariat. Legend reverses out of the irish whip from Charlotte. Charlotte kicks Legend in the face. Legend tags in Jax.

Charlotte with a shoulder block from the apron. Jax catches Charlotte in mid-air. Jax hits The Samoan Drop for a two count. Jax drags Charlotte to the corner. Charlotte avoids The Annihilator. Charlotte walks over Jax. Charlotte lands The MoonSault for a two count. Alexa drops Legend with The Tornado DDT. Jax drives Charlotte ribs first into the apron. Jax avoids hitting the steel ring post. Jax pulls Nikki Bella off her chair. Charlotte inadvertently drops Nikki with The Big Boot. Jax rocks Charlotte with a forearm smash. Jax pie faces Brie Bella. Jax rolls Charlotte back into the ring. Jax goes for a Running Leg Drop, but Charlotte ducks out of the way. Charlotte with Two SuperKicks. Charlotte tags in Alexa. Charlotte nails Jax with The Natural Selection. Alexa prepares for The Twisted Bliss. Brie storms into the ring and attacks Jax which forces the disqualification. After the match, Alexa gets into a shoving contest with Brie. Legend comes in with a double clothesline. All hell starts breaking loose. Nikki with forearm shivers. Jax attacks Nikki from behind. Jax HeadButts Nikki. Legend rocks Nikki with a forearm smash. Legend applies The Bear Hug. Jax connects with The Flying Leg Drop.

Winner: Still WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions, The Irresistible Forces via Disqualification 

– We see R-Truth chopping it up with Jelly Roll in the backstage area. Truth tells Jelly to be on the lookout for Danhausen. Truth introduces Damian Priest to his friend, Sushi Roll. Priest tells Truth that they need to get ready for their match. Jelly Roll had a nice embrace with Randy Orton. Jelly gives Orton props for going after the 15th World Championship at WrestleMania. Jelly asks Orton if he has any advice for him as he’s appearing on Miz TV tonight. Orton says that if Miz starts talking too much, just kick his ass. Jelly gives Randy a big hug and tells him that he loves him.

– Coming out of the commercial break, we see Charlotte Flair and Alexa Bliss bickering with The Bella Twins. Alexa understands that it sucks for Brie seeing her sister get kicked in the face, but if it wasn’t for The Bella Twins sticking their noses where they didn’t belong cost them the Women’s Tag Team Championships. Nikki says that The Irresistible Forces came after them first, they were not going to sit down and do nothing about it. Brie says that they came back to fight for the tag titles, and thanks to Nick Aldis, they’re up next.

Fourth Match: Damian Priest & R-Truth vs. Los Garza 

Los Garza jumps Priest and Truth before the bell rings. Los Garza poses for the crowd. Priest rises back on his feet and he’s pissed. Priest with a double clothesline. Prest launches Berto to the corner. Priest with heavy bodyshots. Angel grabs Priest from behind. Priest launches Angel into Berto. Priest tees off on Los Garza. Priest tags in Truth. Priest whips Angel across the ring. Priest with The Slam Dunk. Truth delivers The Stink Face. Truth plays to the crowd. Angel stomps on the right of Truth. Angel clotheslines Truth. Angel transitions into a ground and pound attack. Angel with repeated headbutts. Angel mocks Truth. Angel is choking Truth with the middle rope. Angel tags in Berto. Assisted Running Knee Strike against the bottom rope for a two count. Berto is raining down haymakers. Berto whips Truth across the ring. Truth ducks a clothesline from Berto. Truth with a Tilt-A-Whirl Headscissors Takeover. Truth does a split. Truth with The Stinger Splash. Angel made the blind tag.

Berto dodges The Leg Lariat. Truth splits under a clothesline from Berto. Berto drops down on the canvas. Angel sends Truth tumbling to the floor. Berto with a Springboard Enzuigiri to Priest. Los Garza with Stereo Orihara MoonSaults. Los Garza has complete control of the match during the commercial break. Truth attacks the midsection of Berto. Berto rocks Truth with a forearm smash. Berto with a corner clothesline. Angel tags himself in. Berto knocks Priest off the ring apron. Assisted Seated Senton. Angel SuperKicks Truth for a two count. Angel with a Vertical Suplex for a two count. Angel with clubbing crossfaces. Angel mocks John Cena. Truth turns a Vertical Suplex into a Stunner. Angel tags in Berto. Truth sends Berto crashing to the outside. Truth sends Angel tumbling to the floor. Truth tags in Priest.

Priest scores two forearm knockdowns. Priest with a series of Switch Kicks. Priest with two leaping back elbow smashes. Priest drops Angel with a leaping shoulder tackle. Priest delivers The Old School Crossbody Block. Priest plays to the crowd. Priest with The Rebound Lariat for a two count. Priest rocks Angel with a forearm smash. Priest kicks Berto in the gut. Priest goes for The Razor’s Edge, but Angel gets in the way. Berto tags in Angel. Angel with The Apron Enzuigiri. Berto with a Springboard Back Elbow Smash. Angel follows that with The Springboard MoonSault for a two count. Angel drags Priest to the corner. Berto tags himself in. Berto goes for The MoonSault, but Priest gets his feet up in the air. Priest goes for The South Of Heaven Chokeslam, but Angel lands back on his feet. Priest stops Angel in his tracks. Priest punches Angel in the back. Priest hits The Razor’s Edge. Priest tags in Truth. Stereo Bell Claps. Priest and Truth connects with their Attitude Adjustment/South Of Heaven Chokeslam Combination to pickup the victory.

Winner: Damian Priest & R-Truth via Pinfall 

– Alex Shelley and Candice LeRae are still having a hard time trying to get Johnny Gargano out of his weird funk. We see Jade Cargill and B-Fab having a private conversation in the background. Chris Sabin appears. Sabin doesn’t know why Shelley keeps wasting time focusing on the guy who cost them the WWE Tag Team Championships. Shelley reminds Sabin that Gargano is a human being, cut him slack. Shelley apologizes for what happened last week. Sabin tells Shelley that he had a conversation with Nick Aldis, and they’ll be having a match with Fraxiom next week. Sabin asks Shelley if he’s still committed to The Motor City Machine Guns. Shelley says yes. Sabin tells Shelley to prove it.

– The Miz runs into Danhausen before he heads out to the arena. As Danhausen’s mentor, Miz should wear his new t-shirt to the ring during Miz TV with Jelly Roll. Miz is not happy that Danhausen got a t-shirt the first day he got into WWE. Danhausen wants to replace Miz TV. Miz screams no. Danhausen mocks Miz by saying really multiple times. Danhausen informs Miz that he’s officially cursed.

– Brock Lesnar returns to Raw this Monday in San Antonio, Texas.

Miz TV With Special Guest: Jelly Roll, Kit Wilson

The Miz: Welcome to most must see WWE talk show in history, welcome to Miz TV! My guest tonight is fresh off of being inducted into the Grand Ole Opry, he has a 3X Grammy Winner. Ladies and gentlemen, get up out of your seats for, Jelly Roll.

Jelly Roll: I like that two-step, Miz, I like that.

The Miz: Cotton-Candy, Sweet and Gold, give it up for Jelly Roll. Welcome to Miz TV, what brings you here to Friday Night SmackDown?

Jelly Roll: Well, I’ll tell you what, Miz, it is the road to WrestleMania, baby. There is no way that I was gonna miss two of my friends who are main eventing WrestleMania, my body, Cody Rhodes, and my brother, “The Viper” Randy Orton, are signing their contract tonight in one of my favorite cities in America. Y’all knew I was coming, what’s up, Phoenix?

The Miz: Yeah, Phoenix loves you in the ring. And let me tell you something, I’ve seen you in this ring, I see the potential, I see the celebrity, I see the moxie. All you need is a mentor. Someone to teach you my Mr. Class, in the three core values of Master, Inspire, and Zone-In. And that mentor is none other than me, all you have to say, Jelly Roll, is yes.

Jelly Roll: No.

The Miz: No?

Jelly Roll: No, no, listen, I love ya, I really do, but I think we all know that you have a history of, every time you get a partner, you end up kind of stabbing them in the back, bubba.

The Miz: Stab them in the back, huh. You know, you’re a good old redemption story, aren’t ya, Jelly Roll? Everybody celebrates your redemption story, don’t they? But nobody ever talks about the person behind that redemption story, and that person is me. Two years ago, SummerSlam, you fell down, and your obese butt couldn’t get yourself back up. You couldn’t get yourself back up, and what happened? To save you from that embarrassment, I reached my hand out and I picked you up. And in that moment, Jelly Roll, in that moment you realized that you needed to change your life.

Jelly Roll: Hold on, hold on, am I hearing this right, are you trying to take credit for me losing 250 pounds?

The Miz: You’re welcome.

Jelly Roll: Are you that delusional? Are you that narcissistic now that, you come out here, and you want to take credit for somebody else’s hard work? I’m the one that got up and ran those miles, baby. I’m the one that changed my life. I’m the one that brought that absolute dog out of me. And for you to stand here and try to take credit, you should be disgusted with yourself, Mike.

The Miz: I liked you better when you were fat.

Jelly Roll: Dog, fat or skinny, I will whip your ass.

The Miz: You better understand who you’re in the ring with and show some respect. I am the locker room leader.

Jelly Roll: You are a locker room loser.

Kit Wilson: Miz, Miz, I beg you, please, stop wasting your time. The problem isn’t you mentoring him, the problem is him.

Jelly Roll: No, no, no, listen, this is getting weird. I like you, Kit Wilson, I think we all secretly kind of like you a little bit, Kit Wilson. In fact, let me show you, just hear me out, Kit.

Jelly does Kit signature flex pose.

Jelly Roll: I’ve been practicing.

Kit Wilson: No, it’s the face tattoos, it’s the criminal charges, it’s building a brand on bad behavior. And now you come out here, you swivel your hips, and you mock me. You mock me when I’m trying to have a serious conversation. The problem is with you, Jelly, you lose 300 pounds and you expect these people to cheer you, like you’re some kind of hero. This man is no hero, you’re a man running away from who you truly are, and you are fat phobic. Yeah, go ahead and laugh, that’s all you do, you laugh, but you’re a changed man, right, you inspire people? You sicken me. You don’t inspire people, you don’t inspire anyone, you reinforce and you promote an unhealthy beauty standard, and that tells me everything, everything I need to know about you, Jelly Roll. Because Jelly Roll, you are toxic.

Kit shoves Jelly. Miz is trying to hold Kit back. Jelly clocks Miz with a big right hand. Kit scurries to the outside. Jelly mocks Kit’s pose to close this segment.

– Ilja Dragunov and Apollo Crews loved seeing The Miz getting knocked out. Carmelo Hayes joins the conversation. Melo heard what Dragunov had to say last week about his mom, and he’s starting to see where he’s coming from with all of this. Maybe this US Open Challenge is too much of a burden for Dragunov. Dragunov says that Melo doesn’t get him. Melo sees an opportunity and he fights for it. Dragunov fights every single minute of his life. Why? Because he’s stuck between two extremes, it’s either complete confidence or the ultimate sucked out, and sadly it’s the only way Dragunov knows how to live, because he doesn’t know peace. Melo says that he doesn’t understand Dragunov, because he takes shots to make shots. He scores points like Bam Adebayo And if Dragunov didn’t give Melo a shot at the United States Championship, maybe he wouldn’t be the champion right now. Melo tells Dragunov lock in, because there’s not a long line of people wanting to fight Ilja Dragunov. Maybe there’s another reason Dragunov doesn’t want to fight him. Dragunov tells Melo that he can’t fight him, because he’s fighting himself.

Tiffany Stratton Promo

Giulia, keep hiding behind that little secretary of yours, because as soon as I beat Kiana James tonight, I’m coming for that Women’s United States Championship. You can kiss that title goodbye, because soon enough, you and everybody else will know exactly what time it is.

Chelsea Green tried to interrupt the promo. Tiffany rolled Chelsea and her wheelchair down the hall.

– Vanessa Hudgens & UFC Hall Of Famer Mark Kerr is in the house tonight.

– Kit Wilson keeps calling Jelly Roll toxic. Kit tells Miz that he’ll go have a conversation with Nick Aldis, if it’s a fight Jelly Roll wants, it’s a fight he’ll get. Danhausen asks Miz if he needs any spare teeth. Danhausen said that he could’ve been out there to defend Miz’s honor. Miz tells Danhausen to get out. Danhausen says that there’s only one thing to do to reverse the curse. Miz turns around and Danhausen disappears.

Fifth Match: Tiffany Stratton vs. Kiana James w/Giulia 

Collar and Elbow Tie Up. Stratton applies a side headlock. James sends Stratton to the corner. Stratton dives over James. Stratton rolls James over for a two count. James drives her knee into the midsection of Stratton. James and Stratton paid visits to multiple turnbuckle pads. James reverses out of the irish whip from Stratton. Stratton showcases her athleticism. Stratton with a drop toe hold into the middle rope. James avoids The Running Hip Attack. Stratton ducks a right hand from James. Stratton with a shoulder block from the ring apron. Giulia runs interference from the outside. James drops Stratton with a Deal Breaker in the ropes. James repeatedly drives Stratton back first into the apron. James throws Stratton into the ringside barricade. James has complete control of the match during the commercial break. Forearm Exchange.

Chelsea Green and Alba Fyre make her way down to the ringside area. Stratton with two clotheslines. Stratton with a Double Back Handspring Elbow. Stratton follows that with The Handspring Stunner for a two count. James blocks The Rolling Senton. James sends Stratton to the corner. Stratton kicks James in the face. James blocks The Cartwheel Alabama Slam. James drops Stratton with The Falcon Arrow for a two count. James goes for a PowerBomb, but Stratton lands back on her feet. Stratton rocks James with a forearm smash. Stratton with The Rolling Senton. Stratton prepares for The PME. Giulia pulls James out of the ring. Stratton lands The Suicide Dive. Giulia prevents Chelsea from attacking Stratton with a pink stretch. Giulia shoves Chelsea back into her wheelchair. Giulia grabs Stratton behind the referee’s back. James inadvertently kicks Giulia into Chelsea and Alba Fyre on the outside. Stratton hits The Rolling Senton. Stratton connects with The PME to pickup the victory.

Winner: Tiffany Stratton via Pinfall 

– Next week on SmackDown from Raleigh, North Carolina, The Irresistible Forces will put their WWE Women’s Tag Team Titles on the line against The Bella Twins. Plus, Jelly Roll will call out Kit Wilson.

– Cathy Kelley had a backstage interview with Trick Williams. First things first, Nick Aldis needs to do his job, he had no problem making this match tonight according to Trick. But it’s all good. Since Jacob Fatu wants to call out Trick Williams without his consent, he should take his Lemon Pepper Steppers off and smack the boogeyman out of Jacob Fatu’s ass, let’s talk about it. Sami Zayn joins the conversation. Sami tells Trick to keep talking, he’s been running his mouth for a long time. Sami thought Trick said he was going to walk into the main event of WrestleMania and put this company on his back. All that big talk, but yet Sami is Mr. Can’t Get The Job Done? What has Trick Williams done? Sami saw Trick got dropped in the Chamber, dropped by Randy Orton, and now he’s about to be dropped by Jacob Fatu, because Trick keeps running his mouth and he can’t back it up. That look Trick is giving him, the feeling inside, Sami knows that feeling very well. Trick is embarrassed and he should be. Trick says that Sami is hating really hard. Trick knows why, but Sami is lucky that he’s got a match tonight or he would drop his ass right where he stands. Sami tells Trick that he’s here every week, and he’s very easy to find. Sami tells Trick that he’ll see him around.

Sixth Match: Jacob Fatu vs. Trick Williams 

Collar and Elbow Tie Up. Williams backs Fatu into the turnbuckles. The referee calls for a clean break. Haymaker Exchange. Fatu kicks Williams in the gut. Fatu HeadButts Williams. Wiliams drives his knee into the midsection of Fatu. Williams punches Fatu in the back. Williams unloads two knife edge chops. Fatu reverses out of the irish whip from Williams. Williams leapfrogs over Fatu. Williams repeatedly slams Fatu’s head on the top turnbuckle pad. Fatu hulks up. Fatu with two haymakers. Fatu kicks Williams in the gut. Fatu whips Williams across the ring. Williams ducks a clothesline from Fatu. Fatu drops Williams with a running elbow strike. Fatu with repeated headbutts in the corner. Fatu whips Williams across the ring. Fatu shrugs off with a Twisting NeckBreaker. Williams poses for the crowd. Fatu clotheslines Williams. Fatu with a Running Senton Splash. Fatu with The Handspring MoonSault. Fatu clotheslines Williams over the top rope. Williams regroups on the outside. Fatu goes for The Suicide Dive, but Williams counters with a leaping uppercut. Williams with a Running Clothesline on the floor. Williams poses on the announce table. Williams resets the referee’s ten count.

Williams slams Fatu’s head on the announce table. Fatu blocks a chop from Williams. Fatu uppercuts Williams. Fatu with two knife edge chops. Fatu slams Williams head on the steel ring steps. Fatu resets the referee’s ten count. Fatu drives Williams face first into the ringside barricade. Fatu rolls Williams back into the ring. Williams drops Fatu with a Spinning Leg Lariat. Williams transitions into a ground and pound attack. Williams applies a rear chin lock. Fatu with heavy bodyshots. Fatu HeadButts Williams. Fatu whips Williams back first into the turnbuckles. Williams decks Fatu with a back elbow smash. Fatu ducks a clothesline from Williams. Fatu with a Corkscrew Senton Splash for a two count. Fatu with two haymakers. Fatu follows that with repeated headbutts in the corner. Fatu goes for The Running Hip Attack, but Williams counters with The Trick Kick. Williams with a vicious back hand. Williams with a Leaping NeckBreaker for a two count.

Williams tells Fatu to get up. Fatu dodges The Leg Lariat. Fatu uppercuts Williams. Williams responds with The Flapjack. Williams pops back on his feet. Williams stomps on Fatu’s chest. Williams hits The Pop Up Book End for a two count. Williams pulls down the knee pad. Williams goes for The Trick Shot, but Fatu counters with a SuperKick. Fatu with The Pop Up Samoan Drop. Fatu nails Williams with The Running Hip Attack. Fatu with The Swanton Bomb for a two count. Fatu prepares for The Box Jump MoonSault. Williams heads to the outside. Fatu lands The Suicide Dive. Fatu rolls Williams back into the ring. Drew McIntyre HeadButts Fatu behind the referee’s back. McIntyre drives Fatu face first into the steel ring post. McIntyre rolls Fatu back into the ring. Williams connects with Two Trick Shots to pickup the victory. After the match, McIntyre stands tall over Fatu. McIntyre plants Fatu with The Claymore. McIntyre points his thumb down as he’s standing over Fatu.

Winner: Trick Williams via Pinfall 

Cody Rhodes & Randy Orton WrestleMania Contract Signing 

Nick Aldis: Alright, ladies and gentlemen, just one thing to handle before we get to the business at hand. Drew McIntyre, I guess you didn’t quit, so welcome back. And as a welcome back gift to you, you get Jacob Fatu one-on-one next week on SmackDown. Now, to the business at hand. Ladies and gentlemen, we know why we’re here, to sign the contract for the main event of WrestleMania, the WWE Championship is on the line. So, without further ado, allow me to introduce the challenger, “The Viper” Randy Orton. And now, ladies and gentlemen, please welcome the WWE Champion, “The American Nightmare” Cody Rhodes.

Cody Rhodes: Phoenix, sounds like I know what you want to talk about.  In 2007, I came to WWE, my very first match in WWE was against Randy Orton. And I go on to watch you win the Royal Rumble, you got into an argument with Stu about the sign and the pyro not going off. I go on to watch you main event a WrestleMania and I thought, if I could be like that. And then I left, and this was probably frown on, you put out a post about how you thought I could become a World Champion. And when I came back to WWE, I came back alone. There was no Codyverse, my brother wasn’t with me, my wife stayed home with the babies, but I had you. Randy, I’m not your son, and I’m not your brother, but I’ve always been proud to be your boy.

– Cody Rhodes signs the contract.

Randy Orton: I don’t think you understand, Cody. I need this, I need that. But this, this wasn’t supposed to be hard, this was supposed to be easy, Drew was supposed to be out here.

Cody Rhodes: Randy, let me go ahead.

Randy Orton: But no, how am I supposed to

Cody Rhodes: Let me take this weight off your shoulders, because I’m sure you’re hearing the voices in your head, and when the bell rings, that’s what I expect, that’s what they expect. We get to watch the best Randy Orton has ever been. Randy Orton, who just won a stacked Elimination Chamber. And I know when the bell rings, that I get The Legend Killer, that I get the youngest world champion in company history, that I get the one that JBL said, that if you built a wrestler from the ground up, he would look like you, and he would still say that. I know that we get the master of the three most dangerous letters in all of WWE, but that’s when the bell rings. And after the main event of WrestleMania, when that last bell rings, I want you to know, I will always love you.

– Randy Orton signs the contract. Orton hugs Cody. Orton slams Cody’s head on the table. Orton delivers the low blow. Orton rips off Cody’s dress shirt. Orton dumps Cody out of the ring. Orton launches Cody over the announce table. Orton nails Cody with the steel ring stairs. Orton shoves down Nick Aldis. Cody is busted wide open. Orton with clubbing blows to Cody’s chest. Orton slams Cody’s head on the ring stairs. Orton transitions into a ground and pound attack on the announce table. Cody is bleeding like a stuffed pig. Orton lines Cody’s head inside the ring stair. Jelly Roll is trying to calm down Orton. Orton shoves down Jelly Roll. Nick and Jelly checks on Cody. Orton comes out through the crowd with a steel chair. Orton delivers a vicious on Conchairto with Cody’s head inside the ring stair. Orton brings the chair back into the ring and sits down holding the WWE Championship as the show goes off the air.

Checkout Episode Two Of The SUR Files